On that same afternoon (December 2011) as the first two works came into being, I still had energy and a willing heart brimming with emotion to keep painting; almost some kind of painting trance that had not come to an end. I acted in submission to this energy and the next two paintings flowed. Meet, Greed and Fear. It took me a few weeks to work out how Greed ended up in this category, Fear, was not so difficult for me to add into the fold with Grief and Loss.
I started painting on a scrap piece of paper for Greed. Just the shape of the ghoulish guy. You might be able to see a black line under his lower hand diagonally sloping to his feet. The dog racing next to him is on another piece of paper and they are loosely placed on a background. I think I still haven't glued them down...somehow I like it that I can move them around. Fear: I feel he is self explanatory. Although, he can be put any angle at all and still has a profound effect.
It was natural to put Grief, Loss and Fear together, but Greed kept putting me off-guard. I couldn't figure out how he fitted into the foursome. Not only did he have a more foreboding sense to me, he just didn't seem to be fitting in. He was the only image with hands and an 'accomplice'. I was very curious to find out how and why he might be part of this first collection.
When I returned to Australia a friend came to visit. She was someone I had met at University doing my Art Teaching training and we had reunited at a school where we worked together. When J came over, I showed her these four images. J was the one who illuminated a meaning or purpose to Greed. She had just gone through an extremely painful family experience. Something I was innocently unaware of until I showed her my images. She explained that, Greed is what we do if we keep hold of something that we are not meant to have or keep. When someone we love dies, we need to let them go so we can allow Grief and Loss to take place. (Its a couple of years ago, so J if you read this, please forgive my liberties!!) It was an 'aha' moment for me, (going through my own grief and loss) and one of sharing pain for my good friend. I also understood profoundly the term 'co-created meaning' through this experience. In the therapeutic world the Art Therapist considers the client as expert on their life and emotions and experiences (rather than in some models the 'head doctors' are the experts and they pathologize the clients). The therapist brings their world to the relationship as well. Sometimes, in a considered way, the therapist shares their world with the client as the client shares their world. What this sharing produces is new meanings for both client and therapist. J is my friend...I am not her therapist, nor is she mine...but our relationship is one of art and life. Her interpretations of life, and "Greed" were insightful and true to the reality of loss. We both took something more meaningful away into our lives from this artistic and real life discussion. Love you J. Love to you Grief, Loss and learning to let you go...Greed! Can I let you go too, Fear?
Greed
Fear
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